One-upmanship

One-upmanship or as it's more commonly called: The Pissing Contest. Why is it that when something happens in your life, whether it's good or bad, there's at least one person that you share the news with that invariably has it better or worse than you do? Not only that, but however bad your news is, they don't just have it bad - their news is catastrophic bad? So, instead of your friend commiserating with you over your bad fortune, you wind up consoling them over whatever problem has reared its ugly head and stolen your moment. Doesn't that just suck?

Now, imagine that the person one-upping you constantly is your own mother! How's that for a kick in the head? It wouldn't matter if I won the lottery; she'd win a bigger lottery or else marry someone with more money than the Pope. It's virtually impossible for me to call her and have a conversation relating to anything that pertains to me. She might ask me how I'm doing but she immediately turns the conversation around to her and her aches and pains, her stomach problems and how she can't sleep at night. Oh, and don't worry, she's got more doctors than the President, takes more pills than Courtney Love and has had more surgery than Joan Rivers has had face lifts. My mother is 70 years old so I tend to let her rattle on about it all as I work a crossword puzzle. Trust me - It's just easier.

My sister-in-law is just as bad as my mother. She will interrupt you or talk over you to make her point about how bad her back pains are or how difficult it is to get up, sit down or straighten up. All this from a woman who substitute taught some aerobics/jazzercize classes and the students referred to her as the Terminator. She'll be getting her personal trainer certification, or whatever it is, soon. I don't have much sympathy for her; she's younger than me and in much better shape, obviously. I let her rattle on, too, because if I didn't, she'd just talk over me or interrupt me again seconds later. We don't talk much anymore; I got tired of all the interruptions.

Is there anyone in your life that drives you up the wall by always one-upping you? Leave a comment and tell me about. I promise not to interrupt or to one-up you.